Friday, October 29, 2004

1600 Pennsylvania Avenue
Washington, DC 20520


Law Enforcement:

I was arrested in Kennebunkport, Maine, in 1976 for
driving under the influence of alcohol. I pled guilty,
paid a fine, and had my driver's license suspended for
30 days.
My Texas driving record has been "lost" and is not


I joined the Texas Air National Guard and went
AWOL. I refused to take a drug test or answer any &n! bsp;
questions about my drug use. By joining the Texas Air
National Guard, I was able to avoid combat duty in


I graduated from Yale University with a low C average.
I was a cheerleader.


I ran for U.S. Congress and lost.

I began my career in the oil business in Midland,
Texas in 1975. I bought an oil company, but couldn't
find any oil in Texas. The company went bankrupt
shortly after I sold all my stock.

I bought the Texas Rangers baseball team in a
sweetheart deal that took land ! using taxpayer money.

With the help of my father and our friends in the oil
industry (including Enron CEO Ken Lay), I was elected
governor of Texas.


I changed Texas pollution laws to favor power and oil
companies, making Texas the most polluted state in the
Union. During my tenure, Houston replaced LosAngeles
as the most smog-ridden city in America.

I cut taxes and bankrupted the Texas treasury to the
tune of billions in borrowed money.

I set the record for the most executions by any
governor in American history.

With the help of my brother, the governor of Florida,
and my father's appointments to the Supreme Court, I
became President a! fter losing by over 500,000 votes.


I am the first President in U.S. history to enter
office with a criminal record.

I invaded and occupied two countries at a continuing
cost of *over one billion dollars per week*.

I spent the U.S. surplus and effectively bankrupted
the U.S. Treasury.

I shattered the record for the largest annual deficit
in U.S. history.

I set an economic record for most private bankruptcies
filed in any 12-month period.

I set the all-time record for most foreclosures in a
12-month period.

I set the all-time record for the biggest drop in the
history of the U.S. stock market.

In my first year in office, over 2 million Americans
lost their jobs and that trend continues every month.

I'm proud that the members of my cabinet are the
richest of any administration in U.S. history. My
"poorest millionaire," Condoleeza Rice, has a Chevron
oil tanker named after her.

I set the record for most campaign fund-raising trips
by a U.S. President.

I am the all-time U.S. and world record-holder for
receiving the most corporate campaign donations.

One of my best friends, Kenneth Lay, presided over the
largest corporate bankruptcy fraud in U.S. History,

My political party used Enron private jets and
corporate attorneys to assure my success with the U.S.
Supreme Court during my election decision.

I have protected my friends at Enron and Halliburton
against investigation or prosecution. More time and
money was spent investigating the Monica Lewinsky
affair than has been spent investigating one of the
biggest corporate rip-offs in history.

I presided over the biggest energy crisis in U.S.
history and refused to intervene when corruption
involving the oil industry was revealed.

I presided over the highest gasoline prices in U.S.

I changed the U.S. policy to allow convicted criminals
to be awarded government contracts.

I appointed more convicted criminals to administration
than any President in U.S. history.

I created the Ministry of Homeland Security, the
largest bureaucracy in the history of the United
States government.

I've broken more international treaties than any
President in U.S. history.

I am the first President in U.S. history to have the
United Nations remove the U.S. from the Human Rights

I withdrew the U.S. from the World Court of Law.

I refused to allow inspector's access to U.S.
"prisoners of war" detainees and thereby have refused
to abide by the Geneva Convention.

I am the fir! st President in history to refuse United
Nations election inspectors (during the 2002 U.S.

I set the record for fewest numbers of press
conferences of any President since the advent of

I set the all-time record for most days on vacation in
any one-year period. After taking off the entire month
of August, I presided over the worst security failure
in U.S. history.

I garnered the most sympathy for the U.S. after the
World Trade Center attacks and less than a year later
made the U.S. the most hated country in the world, the
largest failure of diplomacy in world history.

I have ! set the all-time record for most people
worldwid e to simultaneously protest me in public
venues (15 million people), shattering the record for
protests against any person in the history of mankind.

I am the first President in U.S. history to order an
unprovoked, pre-emptive attack and the military
occupation of a sovereign nation. I did so against the
will of the United Nations, the majority of U.S.
citizens, and the world community.

I have cut health care benefits for war veterans and
support a cut in duty benefits for active duty troops
and their families -- in wartime.

In my State of the Union Address, I lied about our
reasons for attacking Iraq and then blamed the lies on
our British friends.

I am the first President in history to have a majority
of Europeans (71%) view my presidency as the biggest
threat to world peace and security.

I am supporting development of a nuclear "Tactical
Bunker Buster," a WMD.

I have so far failed to fulfill my pledge to bring
Osama Bin Laden to justice.

During the Iraq War and Occupation thousands of
American troops were injured and killed. I did not
have the time to attend any of the funerals for our
fallen soldiers but I did have the time to attend more
than 43 fund-raising events of the Republican party


All records of my tenure as governor of Texas are now
in my father's library, sealed and! unavailable for
public view.

All records of SEC investigations into my insider
trading and my bankrupt companies are sealed in
secrecy and unavailable for public view.

All records or minutes from meetings that I, or my
Vice-President, attended regarding public energy
policy are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for
public review.



1 comment:

  1. Anonymous12:04 PM

    I think he's going to need that as a resume! Things DON'T look too good for him right now.